January 13, 2018

Dealing With Feedback


I recently read the book by Celeste Headlee: We Need To Talkand remembered those dreaded words said by bosses, mothers and friends, which usually indicated –“You have messed up”.

In business we need to welcome feedback.

When studying Neuro-Linguistic Programming in 2012, I learnt about Johari’s Window for the first time.

Johari’s window taught me that:

  • There are some things that you are aware of in yourself
  • There are things that others are aware of in you, that you are not aware of.

The only way for you to grow and make changes, is by being open to hearing feedback about those things, that’s irritating others.

So that you can change.

I don’t always find receiving constructive feedback easy, do you? 

I’d like to share a constructive feedback strategy that works for me with you. 

Tip 1: Welcome it

If someone is giving you feedback, welcome it. If they didn’t say that they weren’t pleased with your product or service, there would be no way of you finding out, or fixing it.

Tip 2: Get yourself into a good space

Once you hear these words: “We need to talk”, get yourself into a good space, before entering that room. Tell yourself that this is just their opinion, and you are open to learning and to growth. Focus on the behaviours, on what you can do differently. Be careful if this demotivates instead of motivates you to make positive changes.

Tip 3: Ask for clarification

If they say they are not happy about something, ask them to clarify exactly what they were not happy with, and what you can do differently in the future. By knowing what specifically was wrong, you can understand their expectations better and by focusing on the solution. It then becomes a positive exercise.

 Tip 4: Be open to learning

Ask yourself what are you not noticing, how did they and others perceive your behaviour from their point of view?

Tip 5: End of a high

Thank them for their feedback, and end on a positive note.

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